I've been without Internet in my home for six and one half days. To do my job, I have been commuting to Andrew and Mary's where I am graciously lavished with the Internet's bounty. Today, however was supposed to be different.

Telstra was scheduled to connect my line at some time between 8am and 1pm. The exact time being known only to the technician and to God.

The technician called me at around 9am saying that he had connected the line at the exchange and was just confirming that. At around twenty to twelve, he called me, confirming my building was indeed number 250 that's two-five-zero. Then he hung up.

He called me again. You see, we both need to be sure that the building I live in is indeed two hundred and fifty that's two-five-zero, the one next to the service station. We assured each other of our certainty, then he hung up. I started worrying. I had expected a certain level of confusion—Telstra have a reputation to maintain—but this seemed excessive.

My phone rang again. Apparently the technician and I are both victims of a cruel deception. "They" told him that he was supposed to connect me on the building on the other side of the road. "They" gave him the wrong details, although apparently the correct address. He sees now that the place where I should be connected to is right next to my building.

He's sending the job back to them. They will sort it out. They will probably call me tomorrow or the next day and send him out again, he says. They will explain what's going on. No, my line hasn't been connected today.